I had it in my head that getting a new puppy would make everything all better. I was wrong.
Last Sunday I went to a local rescue's meet & greet. All the dogs they had that were available to be adopted were there. I came across the sweetest 12 week old lab/hound mix. He was perfect. I filled out the application to adopt him and got the call Monday that I was approved and could come and pick him up.
Tuesday was the day. I dropped Ryanne off at preschool and headed over to pick the little guy up. I was so excited. It didn't last long.
This puppy was potty trained, crate trained, well mannered, fun and didn't bother Greyson too much. Isis took a liking to him...the cats would have killed him if they could have figured out how. They were less than thrilled with the barking puppy we let invade their house.
Wednesday morning I woke up with a knot in my stomach. Just thinking about the puppy possibly chewing the new furniture, the responsibility, the not being about to leave the house for more than a couple hours at a time got to me in the worst way. Really I was having a huge ass panic attack regarding the cutest, well behaved puppy.
Thursday I called Kolin at work and asked him if he would hate me if returned the puppy. I just couldn't do it. He came home real quick on his way out of town and I just cried. My heart is broken and even though I know we can't have Chief back, that's really what I want.
I emailed the rescue and told them that it just wasn't working out for us. Nothing on the puppy's part...I couldn't have asked for a better puppy for our house. It was all on me.
I dropped him off Saturday afternoon. I told him I was sorry, I just wasn't ready. I don't know if I ever will be. I do know that for now it was way way way too soon.
The kids handled it a lot better than I thought they would. Karis was the most upset saying that we need 2 dogs. I told her right now we only need one and that special dog is Isis.
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